The Adventures of the Lone Cupcake

The wind whistled through the kitchen, swirling the powdered sugar around the still figures. One lone cupcake stands before a horde of chocolate torte brownies. They are both still; the brownies uncertain whether to believe the tales about this lemon cupcake, the cupcake waiting for the right moment to move.

The Lone Cupcake stands strong against the dark forces of chocolate.

The lemon cupcake has traveled long and hard to get to this kitchen. It has endured metal tornadoes, blistering heat, and witnessed the death of all of its compatriots. It is tired, disgruntled, and not a little bit interested in tangoing with these fudgey buffoons.

The microwave timer beeps, its shrill shriek echoing across the silent kitchen. The wall of fudge slurpingly separates itself as the leader of the chocolate torte steps forward.

“This kitchen is full of goodies. We don’t need your kind here. Best you be leavin’ before somethin’ happens.”

The lemon cupcake knew that if it left this kitchen, it would never find its way to a satisfied stomach. It shifts its weight from side to side, feeling the pan beneath its spongy bun. “Sorry, folks, but this strawberry coated lemon cupcake likes this town. I think I kinda wanta stay.”

Without warning, the chocolate torte horde rushes forward with sticky cries of violence. But the lemon cupcake is prepared. With a leap and a spin, the lemon cupcake twirls its strawberry head around the body of the torte. It lands with finesse on a plate near the brownie pan.

“Get ’em! Don’t let it get near the Hands!”

But it is too late. The strawberry frosted lemon cupcake is too different from the pan of rich chocolate torte. It had been noticed by the Hands.

“Yeehaw!” the cupcake crows in delight, as the Hand pulls it closer to the Mouth. The gang of chocolate torte crowds against the sides of the pan, howling in anger and despair.

The lemon cupcake is filled with peace as it approaches its final destination. This is what it was meant for. This is its destiny.

The squares of torte watch in violent jealousy as the danged lemon cupcake takes their rightful spot in the Mouth. There aren’t enough Mouths to eat all of them as it is. That cupcake just signed the rot warrant of yet another fudgey square.

The last words the lone cupcake hears before fulfilling its purpose are, “Curse you, lemon cupcake! Curse your fluffy strawberry icing! CURSE YOU!’

And then it was dark. And the lemon cupcake was finally at peace.

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4 Comments to “The Adventures of the Lone Cupcake”

  1. I thought this post was great. I loved the personification and humor. Your blog never does the same thing twice and it’s very refreshing. 🙂

  2. this is such a lovely funny quirky short story exercise. your sense of humor is so light and delightful. the cupcake is very square. I like how you capitalize the important things (hands, mouth). it reminds me of winnie the pooh.

  3. This is hilarious. I always look forward to reading your blogs. Very creative!

  4. Lovely! The question I have is where were all the premenstrual woman desiring chocolate when the chocolate tortes needed them? This must have been a house full of young men. Thats all there is to it!

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